Apples and Felines and Cat Piss, oh my!

::twitch twitch::

I’m having a glass of wine while iLife ’06 installs.

My cat, Sam, the fourteen year old queen of all bitches, has taken it upon herself to piss all over anything that isn’t outside her reach or electrified. I’d actually sort of prefer she pissed on an electrical outlet at this point. Since Jennifer and Francis moved in along with their cat Allie, Sam has responded to the stress of having a younger, prettier woman move in by pissing everywhere. And I know people say cats won’t piss where they live, but in my case the cat pissed on the exact spot on her comforter where she sleeps. And it’s not cause she’s incontinent or anything; she used to do it when we had Missy, our little Jack Russel Terrier. She’s just insane that way. So I have a down comforter with a big yellow stain on it. Wünderbar.

So I looked up recipes online for cat piss deodorizer for the carpet, where she has also taken to pissing. I settled on a baking soda sprinkle followed by vacuuming, followed by a dilute vinegar and orange oil spray. So I go to the market and pick out my vinegar and baking soda and head to the self-checkout stand. Whereupon, the vinegar starts leaking and soaking the basket, the checkout, and the baking soda boxes. I don’t have to tell you what that was like. I felt like saying, “That’s what I get for buying store brand,” but since the Ralphs employees were being so helpful I refrained from that display of passive-aggressivity.

So I got home and applied the baking soda to the carpet. While that was working its magic, I turned my attention to my newer PowerBook, whch has come down with a case of the Freeze For No Reasons. DiskWarrior, Disk Utility, and the Hardware Check all report the computer is fine, so I erased and zeroed out the drive and tried to reinstall OS 10.4, which caused another freakout. So, at least now I know it’s hardware, since there’s not a stitch of software on the system. After work tomorrow I’ll head down to the Apple Store and have a polite conniption fit, as said laptop is itself a replacement for a PowerBook that suffered complete hard drive, power supply and DVD drive failure. Garr.

On the bright side, I found all the videos of the various pyrotechnics I have created over the years and will be collecting them into a montage to be posted here or somewhere convenient in the near future. Hence the installing iLife ’06 on this computer. I refuse to let the bowling balls God throws at me get in the way of my opening cans of whoop ass on teddy bears and sharing it with the world.


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